Double-secret opt out non-confirmation

Pigs Can Fly, they just don't get there on time
Caption: Inspiration that I will, eventually get where I need to…

Today I was supposed to be in a free training class by the host vendor of the conference.  At least I thought I was.  The “you are confirmed for … training” email  apparently had a secret “respond to the confirmation or we’ll opt you out” question buried beneath the fold.   When I inquired about the training specifics, I was told the classes are full, thank you for playing!

The Nation's InnkeeperUnable to get an earlier flight without buying a new ticket at surprisingly exorbitant prices or spend the time camped out in the lovely hotel, I went to the Ford Museum for a few hours.  The factory is currently idle, and may be idle for a few additional weeks.  Inside is an eclectic snapshot of American culture.  There are lots of cars like the Continental Mark II and Cadillac El Dorado (even though it’s excessive, it is pretty), roadside arcana like the ubiquitous Holiday Inn sign I remember from family vacations in the 70s, furniture, Buckminster Fuller’s Dymaxion House, various examples of assembly line manufacturing, and plastic mold injection souvenir generators, each offering a different result like a figurine of Henry Ford, a 1965 Mustang, Abraham Lincoln’s Head, and the Oscar Meyer Wienermobile.

It was weird as it sounds.

The Wiener Mobile

After stopping for lunch, I went to the airport to hang out until my flight.   The little nook was nice and quiet until a flight attendant sat down in the area, sharing her personal, non-salacious stories of woe to a friend and everyone within earshot of her phone.

Graffiti Rocks

The next available power outlet was several gates later, underneath the Cone of Announcements, the focal point of overhead speakers.  Once a minute, there is a message about some passenger needing to get his sorry ass down to Gate XX.   _Or_ “heightened security.”  (Dude: when heightened is all the time, it’s no longer heightened.  It’s “Situation Normal.”)  _Or_ a reminder that smoking is prohibited.

While wandering around, I noticed the rocks in the faux trees across from Detroit Airport’s gate B-18 all have clever graffiti, mostly centered around people’s travels.

My current situation can be summarized as follows:

  • I was trying to get to Rhode Island.
  • I am in Connecticut.
  • My clothes are in Kentucky.
  • The meetings I’m attending tomorrow are in New Hampshire and Vermont.  [I went to K-Mart to buy a shirt and pair of jeans.]
  • My clothes will be in Massachusetts when I return.  [Thursday 5pm Update: Not a chance.  They went to go see Young Frankenstein.]  [Friday 8am Update: Yay, we have clothes – and a shaving kit!]

I can't keep it straight, either.

Fasting seems to help ameliorate the symptoms of jet lag. Kroger sells cough drops in large quantities. Dunkin Donuts is everywhere, and they have a line.

1 thought on “Double-secret opt out non-confirmation”

  1. But did your errant wardrobe at least have the decency to get some bourbon balls (SDF – Louisville) or send a postcard? 🙂

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